05 Jun Why Bucket Lists Are A Total Waste of Time
Up until 2007, with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholas’ movie, The Bucket List, people just had a running list in their heads of things that they wanted to do after they retired, or before they died, or ‘kicked the bucket’. They didn’t have a name for it. Don’t get me wrong – I LOVED that movie! Morgan Freeman is one of the greatest character actors in our time in my opinion. And Jack Nicholas, well, he’s Jack...what else needs to be said, right?
My problem isn’t with the movie. My problem is with the concept of bucket lists. This idea of freakin’ waitin’ to do the things one wants to do in life until they’re standing (or close to standing) on the welcome mat of Death’s door...well, it’s ludicrous!
When nearly all people who reach their deathbed have as their biggest regret that they lived how everyone thought they should rather than the way they truly wanted, why then would good, intelligent, beautiful souls decide to risk waiting to really live?
I mean, let’s face it: there are no guarantees on how many tomorrows any of us have. Yet nearly all of us regret that there was more we wanted to have done with our lives, that we should have done but didn’t because it wasn’t the right time, others wouldn’t support it, or really..more often than not...just out of plain fear.
That ugly four letter word will bite us in the ass every time: F-E-A-R.
Sure, there are real life things that can get in the way of our life dreams, like finances, time commitments, partners who aren’t supportive, and more. But there are far too many real life examples of people who, WITH all those ‘Yeah, But’s’ in their lives, freakin’ found a way to get over, under, or through these obstacles to really truly L-I-V-E. They had the COURAGE to stand up to those ‘Yeah but’s” playing over and over in their heads.
Working with clients over the years, I have found that the one common denominator in holding them back has been indeed FEAR.
- Fear of being judged for stepping outside of the norm, their status quo
- Fear of falling short
- Fear of not being “enough” against some unknown measuring stick
- Fear of being too old/too young
Let’s be honest here: we ALL have fears, silent ones that plague us, that hold us back, that have us live smaller than who we really are.
But what sets us apart from those who just punch in and out of life, is when we decide to Damn the Torpedoes, to just fuckin do it, to get hellbent on figuring out how to do it, whatever that IT is.
And yes, sometimes, when we do there are bruised knees and egos, broken hearts, and other bumps and bruises. It’s those other times though...when we are rewarded HUGELY! Rare opportunities, fortunate twists of fate, breathtaking experiences, and legendary, life-changing moments are all found on the other side of FEAR.
So after a lifetime of playing it safe, of playing by the rules they gave you, how does one embrace an authentic life, a reclaimed life?
Well how do they say that you eat an elephant? Right – one bite at a time. (No elephants were harmed in this example.) You start small, one step at a time, like in your own backyard, in your normal day. There are three steps you can take tomorrow to start reclaiming your life and more importantly, learning to experience the new, and bust through the fears.
Step 1 – Fight Fear With Fear
Are you afraid of your life staying the same? Are you afraid of future regrets of the decisions you make today? Most people try to stuff their fears or hide from them like ostrich head in the sand. I recommend instead that you embrace this fear for your future, and USE IT against your other fears. Make it bigger, hairier, scarier, badass-er, than your fears of failing, of being different, of not being enough. When you fear what didn’t happen more than what could happen...then you’ve got some serious jet fuel! Yeah – its kind of a mind screw, but damn, does it work!
Step 2 – Fly Your Freak Flag
Ok, now that you’ve got some serious jet fuel for this big change, and are HELLBENT on getting er done, it’s time to get out there and find your fun! Look for opportunities to step outside of your norm, your routine, and to do, see, be things different than you did yesterday. Stretch. Go wild. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone – so GO THERE! Find people too that support you on this journey – people that say you ‘CAN’ vs those who say you ‘CAN’T.’ I’m not saying dumping your friends or family, I’m just say find those too who are like-minded and support you. Your loved ones will not only be surprised by this new you, but will totally LOVE the infectious life and spark you bring to theirs! Check out my FREE guide too - ‘Say F#$k It To Your Bucketlist: A Closet Rebel’s Guide To Livin’ Badass Life’ to get some great ideas on how and where you can find some new adventures in your every day.Say F#$k It to routine! Grab free guide from expert lifestyle strategist http://bit.ly/1TVAOte Click To Tweet
Step 3 – Soak Up The Rewards
When you step out of your routine, your comfort zone and find adventures, sure you’ll have fun and more interesting conversations with family and friends, but your biggest reward will be the CONFIDENCE that builds with each new experience. This renewed confidence will help you see the possible in the former ‘impossible.’ You will believe that IT can indeed be done; whatever that IT that has been itchy at you forever. You will be hellbent on finding ways to overcome any obstacle that comes your way. Confidence from experience will ALWAYS cure the ‘Yeah but’s’
So throw away those ideas of bucket lists, or waiting til ___________ (fill in the blank: Friday, summer, retirement, etc, etc) to start living your life. Embrace the moment you have today to Live your authentic life!
Start today...not tomorrow and ‘Say F#$k It To Your Bucketlist’ and start living YOUR life! Your future self is depending on you!